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Essay / Research Paper Abstract
A 3 page paper. The writer evaluates and critiques an essay written by another student. The topic is Maxwell's thoughts on selecting the right people for the team. The writer finds faults with the other student's essay and discuses these. Bibliography lists 1 source.
Page Count:
3 pages (~225 words per page)
File: ME12_PGmxtcq9.rtf
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Unformatted sample text from the term paper:
identifies the five principles as outlined by Maxwell and provides a few examples to make the concept clearer for the reader. The sentence structure in this essay is sometimes
awkward. One example is long: "Your production output drastically increases when your efforts are combined with others as the team works within a common vision and clearly defined goals." It
is a passive sentence and a team works towards" a clearly defined goals. A team has a common vision, they do not work within a common vision. The word team
infers there is a group of people working together. The sentence should identify members of the team, members should have a common vision. A shorter sentence would work better: When
members of a team share a common vision and have clear goals, their productivity will be greatly enhanced. Another issue is the example of the Army commanders. In any
military service, there is a clear hierarchy and troops follow that chain of command. This is true for both enlisted persons and officers. It is a given that a Four-Star
General will direct those under him or her in all matters. The sentences leave the reader wondering what is being said. For example, "commanders from battalion level up publish yearly
training guidance so that each organization is able to plan its training out while ensuring that it is properly nested with the next higher command." The structure is awkward.
As a reader, I want to know "yearly guidance what? Is it a training guidance manual, CD, DVD, book, report or what? If I am unfamiliar with where the battalion
commander falls on the hierarchy, I do not know who is higher. I looked it up on the Internet and found that battalion commander is not really a rank: "This
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